god bless you

was god a man or woman?

this is a very common question to most christians,
was god a man or woman?
i would say that most would say he was a man. now if this was not a fictitious charactor, i would say man. why? biblical pictures indicate he had a fucking beard. so lets debate. a dumb ass debate at that. was a fictitious charactor who went by the name of jesus a man or woman? god was the one who created it all. he created himself. he created man. he created woman. he created himself before man or woman. he has no cock and no pussy, because he created himself before these 2 things existed. because he had not created them yet, he had to be a man? its like a childrens story when the child says mom so how did the cow save his family? the mother looks curious and simply says faith.

the world as you know it, i'm no crazier than you

212 years ago, the dragonfly god jerumino (heh-room-ino) created the planet earth from a fragment of dust off of the planet veijoo (vee-eh-who), commonly know as "the moon". jerumino created all living and non-living things on the earth in 3 minutes. jerumino the dragonfly was in fact not a person, but a dragonfly. in the year 1898 a.d. or 100 years after jerumino created the world jerumino became angry with the world, and filled the land with the creatures known as umbientes (ooh-m-bee-in-tays), commonly known as "dinosaurs". the umbientes were all human flesh eating beast. the umbientes killed all but 2 humans in the year 113, or 1903 a.d. in 115 or 1905 a.d. mahjimbur and janet (mah-heembur and janet), were the only 2 survivors. they had 2 monkeys and a snake. the monkeys gringeviti and peghnukcinson and the snake lucifer. the creater of the earth jerumino told mahjimbur and janet that they must sacrifice the only snake that they had to him and he would allow them to have sex with the monkeys, to re-create the living population on the earth. so they did. lucifer however was not happy about this. and he told jerumino, why jerumino, i have been your loyal snake my entire life and this is how you treat me? i will make it my goal to defeat you. so jerumino told lucifer, you are banned from uladian (you-lay-dee-an) commonly known as heaven. and you are damned to crawl below the earth in tianokkashioneyshin (tea-ah-no-kah-she-own-e-shin).

the world as you know it, i'm no crazier than you

this will probobly never be continued...

i recently bought another ben folds album, "songs for silverman". it's pretty much like the others, amazing. i'll leave you with these lyrics.

Under some dirty words on a dirty wall
Eating takeout by myself
I played the shows
Got back in the van and put the Walkman on
And you were playing

In some other dive a thousand miles away
I played a thousand times before
And like pathetic stars, the truck stops and the rock club walls
I always knew
You saw them too
But you never will again

It's too late
Don't you know
It's been too late
For a long time

Elliott, man, you played a fine guitar
And some dirty basketball
The songs you wrote
Got me through a lot
Just wanna tell you that

But it's too late
It's too late
No, don't you know
it's been too late
for a long time

Oh no
Things were looking up
Least that's what I heard
Oh no
Someone came and washed away your hard-earned
Peace of mind

When desperate static beats the silence up
A quiet truth to calm you down
The songs you wrote
Got me through a lot
Just wanna tell you that

But it's too late
It's too late
No, don't you know
It's been too late
For a long time
It's too late
It's too late
No, don't you know
It's been too late
For a long time

pandora

pandora thinks that i would like billy joel.
go fuck yourself pandora.

so easy

laid on the couch for almost 4 hours eating pizza and watching poker. time to shower and get ready for the day tommorow. fucking exhausted. i am really starting to dig this lazy after work thing that i've got going on. no christians are fucktarded comments tonight, just time to shower and sleep.

leaving you with this one...
Catholics are against abortions.
Catholics are against homosexuals.
But, I can't think of anyone who has less abortions than homosexuals! -- George Carlin

when life hands you lemons

Bought the new jimmy eat world, pretty durn good. I have over 40 GB used on my i-pod and not a GOD DAMN THING TO LISTEN TOO!!! I love Fridays, but I fucking hate Mondays. Every Friday means Monday is that much closer... Fuck me.

We cannot learn fear of God and the basic principles of godliness, unless we are pierced by the sword of the Spirit and destroyed. It is as if God were saying that to rank among his sons our ordinary natures must be wiped out.
-- Calvin, John

FUCKING GAY

really not sure what gets into people. do i want to die? no, not at all. am i scared of death? sure, at times. why not believe in god? why not live in middle earth? i like the story a lot more, and it seems quiet realistic in comparison.

to a movie

I am trying to figure out which movie I am going to take the old ball and chain to. I know its either get him to the greek or grown ups. tough choices tough choices. my new dog dex is pretty kick ass, even though little kylie is trying to fuck him. and i was gonna smoke a briscuit today but... i slept in so pluckers it is! FUCK YEAH!

A FUCKING TARD

The following was a posting on facebook, and it basically made me have to blog.

I pledge allegiance to the Flag of the United States of America, and to the REPUBLIC for which it stands: one
Nation under GOD, indivisible, With Liberty and Justice for all. REPOST
IF YOU THINK OUR COUNTRY AND OUR FLAG DESERVE RESPECT! Let's see how
many will repost

Yeah, you real fucking patriotic you fucking turd faggot. I fucking hate these little cock-mouth fuck-head assholes.

I am currently listening to deftones & ben folds, nice little mix.

Where the fuck have I been?
I'd been looking for a new fucking job.
What the fuck has been up?
I got a new phone, new house, new job, and a new truck.
A new truck?
Look it's not some massive diesel redneck fuckhead truck.
A new job?
Yeah so far 8-5 is not the worst thing in the world.
A suit and tie job?
no...
A new house?
jealous?
A new phone?
Motoralla Cliq, or click* IDFK
What the fuck is up with you?
I kind of am you...

deuty deuty deuty,

26 But you were unwilling to go up; you rebelled against the command of the LORD your God. 27 You grumbled in your tents and said, "The LORD hates us; so he brought us out of Egypt to deliver us into the hands of the Amorites to destroy us. 28 Where can we go? Our brothers have made us lose heart. They say, 'The people are stronger and taller than we are; the cities are large, with walls up to the sky. We even saw the Anakites there.' "
29 Then I said to you, "Do not be terrified; do not be afraid of them. 30 The LORD your God, who is going before you, will fight for you, as he did for you in Egypt, before your very eyes, 31 and in the desert. There you saw how the LORD your God carried you, as a father carries his son, all the way you went until you reached this place."

32 In spite of this, you did not trust in the LORD your God, 33 who went ahead of you on your journey, in fire by night and in a cloud by day, to search out places for you to camp and to show you the way you should go.

34 When the LORD heard what you said, he was angry and solemnly swore: 35 "Not a man of this evil generation shall see the good land I swore to give your forefathers, 36 except Caleb son of Jephunneh. He will see it, and I will give him and his descendants the land he set his feet on, because he followed the LORD wholeheartedly."

37 Because of you the LORD became angry with me also and said, "You shall not enter it, either. 38 But your assistant, Joshua son of Nun, will enter it. Encourage him, because he will lead Israel to inherit it. 39 And the little ones that you said would be taken captive, your children who do not yet know good from bad—they will enter the land. I will give it to them and they will take possession of it. 40 But as for you, turn around and set out toward the desert along the route to the Red Sea. [a] "

41 Then you replied, "We have sinned against the LORD. We will go up and fight, as the LORD our God commanded us." So every one of you put on his weapons, thinking it easy to go up into the hill country.

42 But the LORD said to me, "Tell them, 'Do not go up and fight, because I will not be with you. You will be defeated by your enemies.' "

43 So I told you, but you would not listen. You rebelled against the LORD's command and in your arrogance you marched up into the hill country. 44 The Amorites who lived in those hills came out against you; they chased you like a swarm of bees and beat you down from Seir all the way to Hormah. 45 You came back and wept before the LORD, but he paid no attention to your weeping and turned a deaf ear to you. 46 And so you stayed in Kadesh many days—all the time you spent there.
...well fuck...